Jenny is confident about herself. She is a hybrid between an introvert and outgoing. She loves travel and food.
I'm sure talking about your business "down there" is not comfortable–unless you're Dutch–then you can talk about anything openly, and people around you will not be shocked. Unfortunately, most cultures are not as open and liberal as the Dutch, so the best and only comfortable way for you to learn about your lady parts is by reading about them. The topics that I discuss here are not even discussed in schools (at least not in conservative cultures). Don't worry, though; it is not because it's not supposed to be talked about and learned, but it is just the fact that most cultures will only dwell on the physiological aspects of the subject and not really address the real questions most women have about their own lady parts.
Let's face it, there are a lot of questions going on in women's heads, but they are afraid to ask them because they think that others would think that theirs is unnatural or something to laugh about. Today, women are viewed in different ways, and with the influence of social media, the gap between what's perfectly natural and that of false reality becomes even bigger. Young women today become confused, and they follow what they think is acceptable, not knowing that they are actually doing more harm than good to their own bodies. For this reason, I would like to somehow educate women out there so they can better understand their own bodies and be confident about them.
1. Vaginas Aren’t Supposed to Smell Like Roses
If you are not perfectly comfortable with your body, you are more likely to be overly self-conscious about how you should smell down there. You probably think, "do I smell normal" or you probably wonder "will my partner be turned off" while they explore your nether regions?
The truth is, vaginas are supposed to smell like vaginas. No, it isn't like a flowery scent that we often see in a feminine wash advertisement on TV. If you just finished a shower, your vagina smells like a hint of the soap you used, or it probably won't have any smell. But do not expect that such a clean smell will last the whole day. Normally, vaginas do not smell awful. It can smell musty or sweaty, it can also be a bit bleachy sometimes, or metallic (during your period). What you eat and what you do also affect how you smell down there. If you just had sex, your vagina will smell differently, of course, but it is normal. If you eat citrus fruits and pineapple, your vagina will smell and taste a bit sweet. If you had onion, garlic, and that sort, then it would be different. As long as you don't smell anything off-putting, it is normal.
The only time you need to worry is when you smell a strong fishy (rotting) and yeasty odor down there. Go and have it checked, especially when the odor is accompanied by an abnormal discharge, itching, pain, discoloration, and discomfort.
2. Washing Thoroughly Is Not Necessary So Douching Is Not Advised
Vaginas are amazing. Its self-cleansing ability is a natural wonder; therefore, you don't really need thorough cleansing. There is a balanced environment of good and bad bacteria in the vagina that keeps the PH level natural and healthy. All you need is water and a gently-scented/non-scented soap with a balanced PH level to keep your vagina clean.
A lot of women feel cleaner and fresher with douching. The truth is, aside from that psychological effect, douching has no other benefits. It doesn't really make your vagina cleaner in fact, according to health experts and ACOG (American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists), douching is doing your vagina more harm than good. It upsets the balance of bacterial growth, increasing the risks of infections, infertility, pelvic inflammatory diseases, and even cancer.
Just leave your lady parts be and just clean it the traditional way...gently with water and mild soap. Avoid douching. Period.
3. Your Entire Nether Region Is Not Called Vagina
Vagina is the term women usually use to refer to their lady parts, but it is not the correct term. The word vagina does not refer to your entire reproductive organ. In fact, your vagina is actually inside your body, which looks like a passageway connected to the cervix (a part of the uterus). The outside part is called the vulva, and it consists of the labia minora and majora, the clitoris, and the urethra (pee hole).
4. Vulvas Come In Different Shapes, Colors, and Sizes
The vulva, which is the outside part of your female genitalia has its own personality, let's just say. A lot of women become paranoid into thinking that their vulva looks ugly and that they should do something about it. Some believe that it is not normal because that's not what they saw in a magazine or somewhere else. In fact, a lot of women undergo cosmetic surgery just to make their vulva look "better".
The truth is, vulvas come in different shapes, sizes and colors. There is no "normal" or "standard" vulva. The "lips" can be lopsided, asymmetrical, or curved. There are women whose outer lips are longer and dangling, some have shorter than the inner "lips", others have closed outer lips like a flower (this is usually seen as the most ideal as the outer lips conceal the inner lips), and there are those whose inner lips are actually bigger and more visible than the outer lips. All these are normal and shouldn't really be a cause for concern.
Another issue that a lot of women tend to focus on, is the color of their vulva. Pink is the most ideal color but you can't have pink lips when you have a dark skin tone. The color of your lips down there goes with the color of your skin. So if you are dark, naturally it will be dark down there. It is just what it is. Same with nipples. Not everyone has pink nipples.
5. Vaginas Will Not Become Loose After Giving Birth or After Lots of Sex
It is a common misconception that when a woman is having a lot of sex, her vagina becomes loose. Others, also believe that after giving birth, the vagina will become loose. This is of course nothing but a myth. Experts found no scientific proof that vaginas become loose after giving birth or if a woman is sexually active. The truth is, vaginas are elastic. According to Dr. Alyssa Dweck MD, Ob-gyn in New York and author of the book entitled The Complete A to Z For Your V, vaginas can be stretched like in the case of giving birth but after that, it goes back to its former shape and size unless some instruments were used like forceps or vacuum during childbirth and then it cannot return to its original size. Vaginas expand and contracts as necessary. I mentioned it a few times that vaginas are amazing for in fact, it is. It may feel loose sometimes especially when you have just given birth but give it a bit of time and some pelvic exercises, and your vagina will be good as new.
Stop thinking that women who enjoy sex have loose vaginas. They probably feel loose because they are easily aroused (most probably because they already know what arouses them and when a woman is aroused, the vagina also expands hence, it feels a bit loose).
6. The Presence or Absence of a Hymen Does Not Always Indicate Virginity
The hymen is a thin membrane found at the entrance of the vagina. For most people, the hymen partially covers the entrance but for others, the entrance to the vagina is almost completely blocked. There are also those women who were born without a hymen at all but that doesn't mean they are no longer a virgin. This means that hymens should not be the sole basis for a woman's virginity. Some women who have intact hymen can loose it or stretch it because of physical activities like sports, cycling or tampon use but it doesn't mean they are no longer virgins. It is so easy for us to believe that bleeding during the first vaginal intercourse is the only proof of a woman's virginity but the truth is, not a lot of women actually bleed during their first time. When the sex is done properly and gently the first time, the woman is less likely to bleed. But some women will still bleed if their hymen is thicker than most and is almost covering the entire vaginal entrance.
7. Vaginal Orgasm Is Not Very Common
In a recent study conducted by Rowland, Cempel, and Tempel, the number of women who admitted to not having orgasms ranged from 10 to 40%. If you think there is something wrong with you because you don't orgasm, then you are probably not doing something right. Penetration alone is not always enough. The clitoris (a bean-like organ at the center of the vulva) should not be overlooked during intercourse. It is the most sensitive part of the female reproductive system, and it is the key to that glorious orgasm. Tell your partner to give this "button" some attention, and you will be there in no time.
The G-spot may very well be some nerves located on the front vaginal wall that is connected to the clitoris in some way. It is not a button, no. It cannot be physically seen, but when it is stimulated, it is enough to give you vaginal orgasms. That is why some experts recommend some positions, and fingering is also believed to stimulate this spot (when found).
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and does not substitute for diagnosis, prognosis, treatment, prescription, and/or dietary advice from a licensed health professional. Drugs, supplements, and natural remedies may have dangerous side effects. If pregnant or nursing, consult with a qualified provider on an individual basis. Seek immediate help if you are experiencing a medical emergency.
© 2019 Jennifer Gonzales
Marie Flint from Jacksonville, FL USA on March 20, 2019:
I think it's normal for young children to explore their genitalia, but many adult parents are put off by this.
The female clitoris is actually the counterpart to the head of a man's penis, only the urinary tract opening in females is below the clitoris, not in the center of it. In Middle-Eastern cultures where female pleasure is forbidden, this is probably the part that gets cut. This practice is slowly becoming outmoded.
Kegel exercises are recommend for women who have already given birth. My own mother didn't know about these and experienced a prolapsed uterus. While her condition was never made known to me until well after I was into adulthood, I suspect she had a hysterectomy.
Your article is helpful to young women and teens. The more we understand our bodies, the better care we can give them.
Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on March 19, 2019:
True. These are things women should know. Thank you.